


Pulled Apart at the Seams

by UpsideAround



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Canon Era, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-21
Updated: 2016-05-21
Packaged: 2018-06-09 17:14:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6916033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UpsideAround/pseuds/UpsideAround
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It's a travesty when two hearts, at different intervals in life, find each other.<br/>And although they would otherwise be perfect for each other, they can't be together, for the timing isn't right”</p>
<p>- Unknown</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pulled Apart at the Seams

**Author's Note:**

> I was originally inspired by the prompt "Some people are meant to fall in love together--but not meant to be together" but this is what I ended up with.
> 
> Also inspired by "Colors" by Halsey. The colors can be literal or symbolic, depending on your interpretation and how far you take the soulmate thing.

_ “It's a travesty when two hearts, at different intervals in life, find each other. _

_ And although they would otherwise be perfect for each other, they can't be together, for the timing isn't right” _

__ \- Unknown _ _

 

* * *

 

Burr’s life was always so grey. Dreary. He’d been alone all his life, entire family fallen prey to the embrace of death.

But he hadn’t. 

Instead of dying, he lay in wait. His soul rested dormant inside his chest, never finding a reason to feel passion. He had no red-hot desire, no heart. 

Hamilton flooded his life with bright light.

From the moment Burr felt a tap on his shoulder and heard a “Pardon me,” from behind him, notes of brilliant gold and passionate reds began to seep into the corners of his world.

And when he turned around and saw Hamilton’s face for the first time, colors exploded violently into his world. For the first time, he felt. He felt somber blue, he felt excited yellow, jealous green, he felt angry reds and regal purple. He felt real.

He felt alive.

Hamilton’s eyes were full of warmth, drawing him in and holding him there. Burr was defenseless against it. He wanted to lose himself. Relinquish control and let himself simply be.

His only escape was when Hamilton turned around at the sound of Laurens’ drunken tones.

At the first shout of “I’m John Laurens and the place to be!”, Burr felt Hamilton retracting his affection.

When “Oui oui, mon ami, je m’appelle Lafayette” resonated in his head, Hamilton turned away from Burr, not looking back.

And after “I am Hercules Mulligan, up in it, lovin’ it,” there wasn’t a single reason for Hamilton to stay with him. 

As his world retreated back to grey, Burr wondered if he had imagined the colors.   
  


There were never two souls more intertwined than the souls of Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton. 

They lived on the same street. 

Sometimes, they would pass each other by. And for that fleeting moment when they locked eyes and nodded at each other, the world would would explode into something more vibrant, more rich. 

But Eliza would wrap her arm around Hamilton’s, leading him away. Burr would go cold at this, the colors of the sky fading into dark hues, bled dry of all saturation.

Once, he turned around after passing Hamilton and Eliza to watch the two of them retreat down the street. Hamilton had turned his head back to look at Burr as well, and their eyes caught a spark for a split second. 

Burr felt the wind tear through him when Hamilton turned back to Eliza, anticipation of a storm rich in the air. 

 

They weren’t together, no, but they had an unspoken connection that ran deeper than either of them cared to admit.

When they were on the same side, they worked as one mind, filling in the blanks of the other’s thoughts. 

They established an easy rapport, tossing comments back and forth. They could work together and defend the same client. Their smiles were relaxed and content. Burr didn’t know why Hamilton’s dazzling smile made his heart race, but for once he didn’t want to lie still.

And when they were on opposite sides, they tore each other apart.

The same fire that fueled Hamilton’s grin fueled their arguments. Burr kept quiet as Hamilton plowed over him, accusations shooting into the chinks in his armor. 

He bled blue.    
  


Hamilton was inescapable; the world shrunk around them, pushing them back together and together again. The walls of the universe crushed around them, no matter how Burr tried to escape. The world wasn’t wide enough.

Burr couldn’t make his way into the senate without getting through Hamilton. 

He remembered talking to him about it one night, when the lights were dim and the colors saturated. 

“This isn’t a personal attack, Hamilton, I don’t understand why you’re lashing out.” Burr kept his exterior stoic, but his head was swirling with violent color.

“This is about my family! I have Eliza and Phillip to look after. My father-in-law can’t just be brushed off as any other senator. We need stability as a family, I can’t have you disrupting that!”

“Do you ever stop talking, or do you allow your mouth to ramble on about meaningless nonsense?”

Burr regretted the words, but he made no move to take them back. Hamilton winced with the notion that the stability of his family was  _ meaningless nonsense _ .

“You know if you do this, we can’t have the affectionate rivalry we’ve always had.” Hamilton was subdued now, notes of dark purple betraying the hurt in his voice.

Burr brushed Hamilton aside and finally took what he wanted. 

Wasn’t Hamilton the one who told him to quit waiting?

 

They weren't good people.

Oh no, they could never be good people.

Hamilton had an affair, and Burr used it to blackmail him.

Hamilton, in his moments of weakness, found comfort in a woman that had the nerves to hold herself upright and take initiative.

Burr, resentful, found it in himself to take initiative and use it to threaten Hamilton’s silence. He had taken Hamilton’s passion and twisted it against him, driving the knife of grief into his chest. He wanted Hamilton to feel the same betrayal he had felt when he learned of Maria. He wanted to feel and be felt until his world went black.

Hamilton loved, and Burr found bitterness.   
  


If a soulmate was someone that came into your life only to break your heart, that was what they were. 

Burr saw red when he discovered that Hamilton had endorsed Thomas Jefferson, personally running Burr’s presidential campaign into the ground. Hamilton didn’t remain neutral, instead he told everyone that he would rather have Jefferson, the man he absolutely despised, than Burr as the president. 

What did that make Burr, then?

The deep crimson poisoned his mind, driving him to write the letter that would seal his fate.

_ Weehawken. Dawn. _

For Burr never knew true passion until he met Hamilton.

 

They were meant to live together. 

And, well, they died together.

Because on that day, when Burr steadily raised his pistol, eyes alight, and shot a musket ball at the speed of a flame into Hamilton’s ribs, his heart stopped feeling the moment Hamilton’s heart stopped beating. 


End file.
